When Caring Ends
Find the section you need:
- Caring for someone who is in a care home
- Coping with grief when someone you care for dies
- Check your benefits
- Getting back to work
If you look after someone who moves into a care home permanently it does not necessarily mean that you stop being a carer. You may still spend a lot of time visiting the person you care for in their care home, helping with care and keeping the person you care for company.
You should still have a carer’s assessment if you find caring continues to play a big part in your life.
Your benefits may be affected if the person you care for moves permanently into a care home. Contact your local carer service to see how your benefits might be affected.
Once the person you care for lives in a care home you can continue to be involved in decisions about their care. Talk to the staff at the care home and make sure they know that you are a carer and wish to be involved.
The Relatives and Residents Association is a national charity for older people in or needing care and their relatives and friends who help them. It has a helpline where you can get free, expert advice about anything to do with older people and care homes. It also has free factsheets that you can download, including ones about rights.
Grief affects people differently but make sure you get some bereavement support if the person you care for passes away.
When you are first bereaved you may be overwhelmed by your emotions, or you may have a natural tendency to avoid your feelings and react in a more controlled way to your loss.
Coping with your grief will mean trying to find a balance between your emotions and managing practical day to day life. This can be especially hard if you are dealing with other pressures such as caring for your children; dealing with finances, employment or housing worries; or facing physical or mental health issues of your own.
Bereavement brings a number of different losses:
- The loss of the person and the relationship you had with them.
- The loss of the role you had as carer and the purpose and identity this gave you.
- The loss of, or disconnection from, some the things you may have given up or lost while you were a carer. This could include losing touch with friends or work.
Don’t isolate yourself
The support you get from your family, friends and neighbours may help you find new meaning in this life changing experience you have had. Make sure you talk to people and don’t cut yourself off. Your friends and family probably want to support you but may not know how to do this. Try to accept help when it is offered, even if this is just enjoying a meal that someone else has made for you.
Our Bereavement Support
In the past, we have connected other bereaved carers with a bereavement group. They were either face to face or over zoom with bereavement counsellor present. The groups were successful and have all kept in touch. We can put you on an 'interested' list, please register your interest by filling out the 'Get in Touch' form below.
Your benefits might change if you are no longer a carer, or don't spend as much time caring as you did.
We have more information about money and benefits and your local carer service may have someone you can talk to about your situation. You could also use Carers Trust online benefits calculator (supplied by Turn2us) or get in touch with Citizen's Advice.
If you are ready for a new challenge you could consider getting into work, studying and training, or volunteering.